Hello 31 -- It's nice to see you

Today, I start my thirty-first year of life.  Yes -- it is my birthday.  I have never really been interested in celebrating myself, but I feel like surviving thirty years on this planet is something I should be excited about.  Looking back to my early twenties, I remember feeling mortified when I thought about being in my thirties, but I also felt like I knew what my life would look like.

At twenty-one, I was the manager of a small kiosk and I lived in an apartment with my boyfriend.  I knew I wanted to get married, but I was in no rush to the altar.  Motherhood, on the other-hand, was nowhere on my radar.  However, when I pictured myself at thirty-one, I saw a woman with a happy home filled with animals, a husband to live life with, and an exciting career in a creative field.

Five years later -- I was twenty-six years old. My previously mentioned boyfriend had become my husband, and two months after we were married I gave birth to our daughter.  My 'promising' retail career fizzled out a year later when my store closed and the company went bankrupt.  Immediately after I was laid-off, I felt defeated, and eventually I decided to make a change in my career path. With the support of my husband, I made the decision to stay home with our daughter instead of moving on to another full-time job.  In addition to my new domestic role, I returned to school with the hopes of earning some kind of degree.

Another five years go by -- It's my thirty-first birthday.  I have been privileged to have been able to stay at home with my daughter for four years.  She just started transitional kindergarten and will turn five in soon.  After a few stumbling blocks, I am a few units away from earning an A.A. degree in Marketing and beginning to earn an A.S. in Business Administration.

This is not what I envisioned for my life at thirty-one. I don't have a career, or even a degree. I have lost friends. I have reinvented my family.  I have set boundaries and made sacrifices, but I have also been given gifts.  I have a warm wonderful home that I share with my husband and daughter (plus 2 cats and a pit bull).  Plus, I have the opportunity to make magical memories with my family every single day -- something that lacked in my life for so long.  This life may not be exactly what I envisioned, but it's exactly what I needed.

Over the last ten years, I have been forced to look at myself in a different way.  Being a mother makes me want to better in many ways, but my mental stability is most important.  And although I don't have a fun, fast-paced creative career (yet), I will get there eventually.  I am proud of where I am, of the lessons I've learned, the obstacles I've overcome, and the person I've become.

So, welcome thirty-one! I cannot wait to see what the universe has in store for me this year, and where I will be when I'm forty-one.